By Faten Omar

KUWAIT: “Quiet divorce” is a term that popped up recently on social media platforms, reflecting the gradual decline of a marriage until the couple drifts apart. Several people spoke to Kuwait Times describing their experiences in “silent marriages”. Um Rayan told Kuwait Times “quiet divorce” exists in many houses in the Middle East due to the wrong marriage culture. “Many Arab women quit the marriage by doing the bare minimum to maintain a relationship. This happens due to many reasons, and one of them is the wrong marriage concept our society forces on us.

The signs of silent divorce can start small, like not having food together and escalate to sleeping in separate rooms,” she added. Um Rayan is one of many wives who are in a “quiet divorce” situation to maintain a good environment for her three children. “Our traditional society requires both of us to be married even if the relationship has ended, just for the children, which I believe are more affected by seeing such an unhealthy marriage,” she said.

Regarding the signs, she said emotional and physical connections will fade; there will be no meaningful communication or intimacy; taking the relationship for granted, and partners will not share their thoughts and feelings, where the focus will be only on children or work.

Mohammad Kadry said “quiet divorce” can be avoided by talking it through. “Me and my wife had a frozen period where our emotions faded away. At first, we were stubborn about our situation, and we took each other for granted. But after we reached a deep dark side, a friend advised me to seek help from a marriage counselor for guidance,” he said. “Step by step our communication was facilitated. When you are calm, the conversation about your concerns will be beneficial.

Sometimes we just have to take time to reflect on our own feelings and needs; understand what specifically is causing unhappiness in the marriage and how it is affecting us,” he added. Abu Abdullah agreed with Kadry, affirming that open communication can help express concerns and desires, but sometimes it can be too late unless both are willing to listen and be honest and open. “In my first marriage, I had many troubles. My ex-wife was not cooperating — she just asked for her needs without listening to what actually could fix our marriage.

What I discovered from my second marriage is that it takes two to fix a relationship,” he explained. Abu Abdullah pointed out that a logical strategy can improve communication, deepen understanding and find ways to reconnect. “I discovered activities for both wife and husband can release their home stress. My first wife was only focused on her being a wife and me; we were traditional and never thought of spoiling ourselves with things and activities we need for better mental health,” he said.