ShareBy Majd Othman
KUWAIT: An education ministry teacher was arrested for allegedly molesting six children. He also threatened the children if they reported the incidents to their parents. This crime has shocked the public, not to mention the psychological state of parents, who are under shock after what their children went through. The most important question that arises is who is to be blamed for the horrors that these children experienced?
Kuwait Times discussed the issue with consultant and lecturer in mental health Huda Al-Jaser, who stressed that despite the great stress parents are suffering from after the incident, they are mainly responsible for protecting their children from those monsters, in addition to monitoring their children's behavior that has unquestionably changed after the incident.
"It is well-known that children who are molested or raped, especially those under five who still cannot express themselves, express their pain through specific behaviors such as nightmares, anger or constant crying. Mothers or guardians will notice there has been a change in their child's behavior, but unfortunately there is great neglect in taking care of children. It is unbelievable that children have full freedom to be on the streets and exposed to attack, which gave the aggressor an opportunity to molest them," she added.
Consultant and lecturer in mental health Huda Al-JaserSigns that a child is being molested
Jaser pointed out several signs indicate to parents that a child is being threatened, molested or raped. "Sometimes, when a child is feeling ashamed, they can hide. This could be a reason for being angry and emotional, in addition to them being aggressive and violent, especially when the child is being threatened by the molester. If the child is exposed to psychological pressures due to regular fears from threats, the effect of the attack on the child is more aggressive and the pressures are extremely severe, which could eventually destroy their life," she said.
Jaser mentioned parents should take notice if the immunity of their children is weak or if they are regularly suffering from illnesses, because a bad mental state affects the body greatly, and for many it causes diseases or weakness to practice regular daily life normally.
"Other signs include urinary incontinence, nightmares and frequently crying for no reason. The child could express their anger through attacking or hitting their parents aggressively, which is a serious sign of a mental disorder, a subconscious action by the child to defend themselves. In addition, some children they try to give a hint to their parents of what they are exposed to, but some mothers or parents don't give them the right attention," Jaser added, pointing out some children express their inner pain by hitting themselves or other kids due to being unable to express what they are going through.
Reporting a molester
"Fear from the society over the child's reputation mostly leads parents to hide the incident and not report the crime to the police, which gives the criminal the freedom to repeat the crime with other kids. This could be the reason for what happened in the current case. Despite the fact that the parents are in great pain from what occurred, the problem is that people fear the society more. These types of incidents are considered as honor crimes, especially for us eastern communities whose culture differs from others," Jaser said.
Taking care of an abused child
"A child being molested or raped should immediately be taken to a psychotherapist to be treated, who should reconstruct the incident with them in a way that helps them relieve the anger and pain they feel, in order for new psychological restorations. Meanwhile, parents should have more awareness on how to deal with their child, who is a victim. In general, parents have to change their way of raising their children with more attention, increasing supervision and awareness in their children and extra care, not to mention not neglecting their children's needs," Jaser said.
"Characters are nothing but a building from the past - if it is injured, its growth will be deformed and needs to be repaired. Education is a care for all stages of the child until they reach the age when they are responsible for themselves. Everything the child is exposed to in their life is locked in their subconscious and begins to appear in the form of mental images that greatly affect them in the future, awareness and daily dealings. We see many adults suffering from strange dreams that take them back to certain stages in their lives, because these things were deep and needed psychological treatment, especially those who suffered from sexual assault," she said.
"The child also needs psychological treatment because they will certainly be affected and need a quick rescue process. There are children who are sexually harassed more than once and are under threat from the offender, which may lead them to drift towards the same behavior as the offender or severe negative behaviors. They may get used to this type of abuse and become addicted to it - in other words, the abuse becomes counterproductive on the child," Jaser explained.
